The Vanity of Not Wearing Glasses

When I was 18 and having difficulty seeing the pins at the bowling alley I went to the eye doc and he prescribed some groovy glasses.. I think I only wore them once a week when I bowled with my team.. those were fun days. Time passed and Uncle Sam knocked on my door giving me a great invitation to serve my country. So when I was 19 years old, I found myself in need of those glasses again.. the Army made me wear their Olive Drab version when I couldn't hit one of those faraway targets on the rifle range.

Well, I got out of basic training and never again donned those glasses.. they might be still hiding in the basement.. been years since I have seen them. About 10 years later I was tooling along at night on a trip to New Jersey to see my family and I kind of got lost.. yeah I missed a sign.. once again I went to the eye doc and got a new pair of glasses - aviator style.. I looked pretty cool. Of course these frames were only needed for night driving

Eventually I began to wear them whenever I was driving - just to be safe.. I knew I really didn't "need" them. Some time passed and one morning I forgot to take them off as I walked through the front door at work. I sat down at my desk and turned my mainframe computer monitor on.. I looked down and when I looked up I was shocked to see the crispness of the text on the monitor. I began to laugh.. it is humbling to realize that your own vanity has caused you to walk around in a fog.

Ever since that day I have worn glasses full time.. about then years ago I bought a pair of progressive lenses.. also known as no-line trifocals.. it is wild getting old. These days I take them off to watch TV but usually have them on the rest of the time. Guess my vanity has given way to my practicality.

Do folks call you four-eyes? How long have you worn glasses? Any stories?


  1. I have worn glasses since I was 17 (71 or 72). I hate glasses. I can't recall anyone calling four-eyes, even friends in joking or horsing around times. That is strange now that I think about it.

    The worst time I had was when I could no longer read driver license numbers and found out there was such a thing called bi-focals. Yikes!

  2. I used to have excellent vision. It got poor gradually, so I didn't even notice. When I went to get my drivers license here in Japan, the first thing they made me do was take a vision test. Their test is different here. Basically it is a bunch of C's facing different directions. You tell the examiner which direction the hole is facing.

    I looked into the device, and the examiner asked me which direction the hole was facing, and I said, "What?" I went out to get my wife, because I assumed I was not understanding him, since he was speaking in Japanese. I said, "Interpret for me, because I have no idea what he's talking about." He said the same thing again, and I told her to look in and tell me if she saw a circle. She said yes, and it was then that I realized that my vision was poor. I couldn't even see the circle, much less which side of it was open!

  3. YOU CRACKED ME UP in the first sentence here! you could not see the pins at the bowling alley so you got groovy glasses!!!! I can so relate to this because I found out how poor my vision I was at age 15 (driver's license eye exam) and got glasses that I wore ONLY when driving and went around not seeing until I got contacts at age 20. Silly us.

  4. I had horn rimmed glasses in High School. In college got my first pair of contact....worn them ever since. I do need "reading" glasses now for Bible Study for book reading.

  5. I started wearing reading glasses in college, then switched to wearing them full time. I went to contacts because my glasses kept getting broken while coaching and playing sports. I still wear contacts, but now I have to wear reading glasses again. Fortunately, I can get them for six bucks at Dollar General. :)

  6. Dark Rims ruined my ability to catch grounders in Center Field during my junior year. When the ball reached the glove I would see the rim and not get the glove on the ball. Tried contacts in my 20s and they hurt and dried out all the time.
    I too enjoy my invisible trifocals.


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