Cubicle Farms

This cartoon brought back many memories of my 20+ years of working in cubicle farms.
A few thoughts about the rules for working in a cube farm from the folks at Office Zen:
  • If you have to sneeze, stand up and sneeze into the air so that you can make sure and give something back to the dimrod that came to work sick and gave it to you.
  • Keep a picture of you and your sister/brother next to a picture of you and your wife/husband on your desk. Keep track of those people who ask the question because those people are detail oriented and will get stuff done.
  • In the mess of sticky notes on your desk, intersperse some notes with themes like the names of diseases. In this case, those that ask the question are people who can't stay focused and did not have the guts to ask about the pictures.
  • Everyone knows that if you stay in you cube and do it, not only will the smell be confined by the three and a half walls around you, but you are likely to destroy any productive conversation with one of your co-workers who always seem to show up when you need to flatulize. 
  • If a co-worker has purposely left you high and dry at any point, leave a note on their computer that says "please call network security" without signing but with the extension. This will keep them worried the rest of the afternoon.
One of my earliest remembrances was sneezing too loudly and having gal in a cube close by always having to comment on my sneezes.. made me a bit hesitant to sneeze.

How about you? Have you worked in a cubicle? Any stories to tell?

7 comments:

  1. Some day I hope to have a cubicle. I'm going on six years in a cubicle environment, but have only ever had a desk. I love the network security thing. I once found that one of my co-workers had walked away without locking their PC, so I pulled down a nice high res screen capture of an MS Windows blue screen of death and set it as her screen saver. ;-)

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  2. I worked for a GE cublicle farm. It's where I want to go when I know I only have an hour to live. Why? Because it will seem like an eternity.

    ---Jon Leahey

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  3. @Mike - love that blue screen gag!

    @Jon - only someone who has done time on the farm can understand that :)

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  4. Here's a few more:
    * when you need to know who's in and whos' not, just stand up and do a roundabout turn
    * when you need to know if you staff is working, just stand up
    * surf the internet with an expression on your face like you are working

    :) I had my share of cubicle days in my former company. I was ok with it. In a sense it allowed me to be both alone and with company depending on what I need for the day.

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  5. It’s funny to walk by the people messing around on the internet and see them scramble to look busy all the sudden.
    I liked the nice pranks like: To Randomly unplug network cables for hours of fun or Remove mouse-ball (Before Optical Mice).

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  6. Oh boy, just in time for me to go back to a cubicle job! (hopefully!). Spent many, many years in one and all the above are funny and true.

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  7. I spent a few months working in a cube. I actually liked the job because I was experiencing burn out and was not required to become personally involved with people. I also worked with different types that I would never have been around. The woman with whom I shared a wall was a former exotic dancer. Once we got to know each other, I enjoyed asking her many curious questions - oh well, I guess I did get involved with people after all!!

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